My Personal Journey with ADHD

During my last two years of high school, I lived with another family. Years later, I discovered that the family had frequent conferences about me because I left ALL the kitchen cupboard doors open ALL the time.

That was ADHD. I still need to focus in the kitchen to open (and then close) only one cupboard at a time. My husband reminds me every day when I forget.

Many people with ADHD do not know they have ADHD, and make unconscious adaptations.

During all my classes – from elementary school through university – I always sat in the front row.

When I was formally diagnosed in my early 50’s, I tried stimulant medications with professional guidance. I eventually decided that I could not tolerate them. My heart rate and blood pressure increased as soon as I experienced any stress. My therapist helped me understand that my anxiety is worse than my ADHD. I have been treated for anxiety for over 5 years.

My late father had ADHD. He used to stare at the coffee pot near the kitchen table as it was filling with coffee, as he was so desperate to drink his first cup. (Coffee is our drug of choice.) I think he compensated for his ADHD by discipline, and organizing himself. He also was obsessive-compulsive. I used to clean his study for him, and he knew if I had moved any item on his desk, even by one inch.

He also demonstrated the ADHD quality of hyperfocus, an intense form of mental concentration that focuses consciousness on a subject, topic, or task.

My hyperfocus can be used productively to concentrate on my work. It can also keep me up for hours if I start looking up recipes, for example. My adaptation has been to ban my cell phone from my bedroom.

Since my formal diagnosis in my early 50’s, I’ve realized that many of my family members have ADHD. Some of my family members have embraced their diagnoses, while others are in complete denial.

When my niece was in 3rd grade, she was nearly failing school, earning only C- grades. She was formally assessed, diagnosed with ADHD, and started on medication.

The next time I visited, I was stunned to see her studying at the kitchen table, and yelling at her twin brother to leave her alone. Her grades increased to B+ within 2 months. I called her my “poster girl” for medications.

She is now a successful, accomplished adult, and drinks coffee (as I do) for her ADHD.

People who suffer from ADHD may not be understandable to those who do not have the condition. But if one can put oneself into the shoes of an ADHD sufferer, one may have more compassion and patience for their plight.

ADHD is a life-long journey. I learn every day how better to cope with my ADHD.